Vulnerability for Helping & Healing

As I sit here writing this, it’s the first week of 2021 and while it’s scary and completely out of my comfort zone, I’m going to tell my story and why I chose to start an outreach program in 2021. First, my outreach program is for residents in assisted living facilities that suffer from depression, anxiety, and/or dementia. I’ll be visiting 4 assisted living facilities in our community to get started (once Covid restrictions have been lifted at each facility). The girls, Grace & Joy, will be coming with me as my little helpers. I’ll be bringing books and babies for the residents to hold. The joyful & calming effects of holding a newborn baby are incredible!  How am I going to be able to bring a newborn baby?  Well, it doesn’t have to be a real baby. Studies have shown that dolls made to look & feel like a newborn baby can have the same effects.  How did the idea for my outreach come to be?!?  Well, it all started with a documentary...

One evening Bill (my husband) and I were watching a documentary about realistic looking baby dolls that are sometimes called “Reborns” or “Art Dolls”. The documentary followed a woman that was unable to conceive children and dealt with severe anxiety and depression. Her therapist recommended she purchase one of these dolls. Not only did the doll help her, but it quickly became a hobby in which she owned and cared for several dolls. Her husband also helped her with her hobby. This woman kept her hobby a secret for many years for fear of people judging her since they didn’t understand it. Just as I’m sure you’re thinking as you read this, I, too, found this “hobby” of hers very odd. My husband and I discussed how strange we thought the whole thing was and left it at that. Or so I thought.  I kept thinking about this woman and how much these dolls helped her. I decided to do further research into these dolls. I found out how therapeutic they can be for women that have suffered a miscarriage, people with anxiety and depression - especially elderly people with anxiety and depression but they seem to be most beneficial for dementia patients when they hold these dolls. All of these things tugged at my heart strings. 

Something I’ve rarely shared, and what makes this blog entry so vulnerable for me to publish, is that I can relate to each one of these painful scenarios (dementia, depression, anxiety, and miscarriage) in different ways. Not many people know, but I had a very painful miscarriage. I ended up having to have a surgical scraping since my miscarriage was only partial (meaning only part of my baby came out during my miscarriage). I woke up from the surgery and cried to heaven for God to give me back my baby! He didn’t answer. So I begged him to bring me my mommy! He didn’t answer. Bill was right by my side trying to console me as best he could. I told him to call my sister and she came racing to the hospital. She left work in the middle of her day to be by my side. Tears flow from my eyes as I relive that day. I haven’t allowed myself to talk about it or even think about it. It was all too painful. What I have thought of is who my baby was and would have become. I also suffer from generalized anxiety disorder. I get severely anxious in just about ANY and ALL social settings. I get panic attacks regularly since my mom passed away and there’s nothing I’ve been able to do to stop them or to lower my anxiety other than medications.  I have loved ones that have suffered from dementia and it’s so painful to see. 

When I was a little girl I loved to play with baby dolls. It was my favorite thing to do, really. So with the studies I read on the therapeutic benefits of these reborn dolls, my childhood passion for playing with dolls, and my suffering from so many of the things these dolls can help with - I knew I needed to invest in one. I say invest because come to find out they aren’t cheap! I felt my heart pressing for me to do more with my dolls than just trying to heal myself. How could I help where these dolls seemed to be most beneficial? In dementia patients? 

All of a sudden, I had the idea to take my dolls to assisted living facilities for dementia patients to hold them. My girls and I will go to these facilities in our community (I have 4 facilities lined up already) and we’ll bring the dolls with us. The residence can hold them and admire them, a great ice breaker, as we visit and get to know each other. I’ll share the love of Jesus with them and hopefully brighten their day.

 I have corresponded with several women in different states that are doing very similar ministries with their dolls. They have helped guide me on the process, which dolls to purchase, and what to expect. One of the women documents all of her visits through photos of the hands of the residents holding her dolls. It inspired me and I’ll be documenting as well in hopes to bring awareness to the therapeutic benefits of these dolls, plus I’d like to bring awareness to mental health and how we can support research to benefit our future generations mental health! 

Once Covid restrictions are lifted, I plan to visit the local assisted living facilities on a weekly basis. That way each resident that I get to know, can look forward to the day/time I’ll be there each week. 

And so 2021 is me getting out of my comfort zone, to not be embarrassed I have therapy dolls, and the start-up of my outreach program! My husband and I discussed names for my first doll (sorta like a naming a real baby 😂) and to use that name for my outreach program. We knew it needed to be a very special name. We decided to go with Hannah Hope.  I now officially have an outreach program named Hannah Hope Ministries! 

I have a Facebook page that I’ll link below.  I also created an Instagram page dedicated to my program and documenting the journey!  You’ll see photos of our first and so far only doll, Hannah Hope, on the pages so far. I’m hoping to get a “sibling” for Hannah as I think two dolls would be ideal, but I’ll need to raise funds before I can do that. . My heart is really set on two dolls but in the meantime I’ll start my program with one. The important thing is that I get out of my comfort zone and go help the seniors in our community! 

If you’d like to visit any of my pages for updates and progress as my outreach program gets started and grows, I’d love the support!  I know not all of you will understand what I’m doing and will find it weird. Just as I found the woman in the documentary with dolls weird. So please, be kind. This is all about helping and healing both myself and others I meet along the way 💕

Facebook:  

Hannah Hope Ministries